Chuck & Blair: Season 1 Scenes <3

The Debarted

From the Script

Blair: "Um, this building... is a homeless shelter. A: Gross. And B: Really?"

Dan: "He's a handsome guy, he's a sophmore. He and Vanessa have a lot in common."

Nate: "He's a douche."

Nate: "Or just forget her, and move on to a... palette cleanser."

Nate: "She's a drama major. Actresses are crazy- Willa!"

Maureen: "You'll get... whatever it is your getting. Screwed, I think they call it."

Basstyle 

 

Realism

First things first, there are no wolves in Long Island! -3

Tripp kept Nate's pot stash, and Serena actually almost smoked years old weed. -1

Nate got to the scene of the accident just in time. -1

Maureen and Tripp went to the hospital why? -1

Serena stormed out of Tripp's house expecting to "find a cab" in the wee hours of the night. (But she would). +1

Serena tells Maureen she has no right to be at her husband's home. -1

Vanessa tries to act like she doesn't believe Dan, but she totally does. And her casual "I love you too." +2

Sum Total: -4

For the Love of Eric Damon
Oh man: the coat, bag, shoes, top, and stockings !  

B's hat

B's houndstooth coat

Vanessa's jacket

Best WTF Moments

1. Chuck's mom at Bart's grave!

2. Tripp left Serena at the accident.

3. Maureen gave Rufus the letter.

4. Jenny is a drug dealer.

5. Jenny & Eric outsmarted each other.

6. Maureen wanted Serena to be Tripp's mistress.

What the Bluck ?  

Music to My Ears "Empire State of Mind" by Jay-Z featuring Alicia Keys

"Suicide" by the Raveonettes

"Too Late" by M83

Treasure of Serena Madre

From the Script

Blair: "Doing the right thing takes courage and strength. At least that's what I've heard.

Jenny: "So what, you hate me, but you've been pretending to be my friend this whole time?"

Eric: "That's pretty much it, yeah."

Dan: "Cece's heart pumps secrets and gun."

Jenny: "What you don't have anything to say to me?"
Eric: "Your sweet potatoes are bland."

Chuck: "A little Thanksgiving proclamation. You two ever play grab-ass in my elevator again, and Serena will be staying at an airport Marriott. Happy Holidays!"

Blair: "What are you clutching?"
Dorota: "Eleanor ask me to pick up things for Paris. It pricvate."

Blair: "You know what isn't? The INS tip line."

Blair: "You know I love Thanksgiving. The parade? On TV? I'm 19! Childhood memories are already slipping away."

Nate: "I told you this would end badly. Threesomes, man. Don't believe the hype !"

Dorota: "He won't stop calling.. and texting.. and tweeting.. and writing on wall."

Blair: "She has some bomb she wants to drop on me in a controlled environment surrounded by air marshalls and French people."

Basstyle 

Realism

Every single character that has ever been on the show is at the same place on Thanksgiving. -3

Vanessa's mom told Dan she could tell he was in love with her. -2 Because that should've been Rufus.

Nate. Just Nate. +2 Because I love who he's becoming.

Rufus still uses an old-school recipe box, in this day and age. +1

Serena. +2 She gets dumber and dumber. AND she chose Tripp over Nate. Tsk, tsk.

Vanessa's mom is haggard nosy, selfish bitch. But she does play the part well. +1

Lily thought Rufus wouldn't mind not cooking for Thanksgiving. -1

Vanessa is already over the threesome? No awkwardness ? -1

Grandma's don't know how to video chat, not even Cece. -1

So... Maureen makes Nate tell her the truth about Tripp and Serena. Ok... but she really owes him an apology for letting him take the blame for the plot to win Tripp's election? -1

Tripp and Maureen didn't even leave after the whole affair confrontation. That's awkward. -2

Blair not only condones Serena and Tripp, but literally tells her to go run away with him. She would never. -2

Sum Total: -7 (Still a really good episode!)

For the Love of Eric Damon
 Serena's dress
Blair's coat Blair's dress Vanessa's dress Stockings !
Best WTF Moments
 

1. Blair finds the pregnancy test.

2. Dorota is the pregnant one.

3. Eleanor & Cyrus are moving to Paris.

4. Maureen finds the letter in her jacket pocket.

5. Nate gives Maureen the tape of Serena and Tripp.

6. Tripp tells Serena he really does care for her.

7. Dan realizes he is in love with Vanessa.

8. Serena finds the letter from her dad.

9. Cece hasn't been sick in months.

10. Serena chooses Tripp over Nate.

What the Bluck ?
 

Music to My Ears "White Sky" by Vampire Weekend"Last Dance" by the Raveonettes"Cool Yourself" by Thao and The Get Down Stay Down"The Only Exception" by Paramore 

Loved Chuck's threat & the look on their faces right after !

The Last Days of Disco Stick

From the Script

Blair: "In the second grade, I saw our gym teacher giving Laverne Glazer's mom the glad eye. Not only did it earn my the first A++ for gym in Constance history, I learned that my sexual tension radar is unparalleled."

Blair: "Oh, the sacrifices we make for success. We'll think of a way to make your day less boring later."

Dan: "It was me, Vanessa, Olivia, two girls, four boobs, and one Dan Humphrey. How awesome am I?"

Nate: "I know things. I've been to Europe. Chuck Bass is my best friend. The third person's supposed to be a stranger."

Dan: "Why are you being such a buzzkill?"

Lily: "What about Brad Alexander? His mother said he's single."

Jenny: "Yeah, cause he gave six girls from Nightingale gonorrhea of the throat last year."

Rufus: "What are you two doing?!"

Rufus: "Did Chuck Bass just say he was going to the planetarium?"

Chuck: "Dude. I'm Chuck Bass. Even Europeans must know what that means."

Rufus: "What's gonorrhea of the throat?"

Blair: "I don't converse with liars or Lewinskys."

Blair: "I have an army to build, a school to take over, and girls to blackmail."

Blair: "Dan? When girls live together, sometimes their cycles sync up. No hormones, yours or theirs, will get in the way of my cabaret."

Basstyle

Realism

For the Love of Eric Damon  Olivia's colorblock dress 

Jenny's gray dress 

Serena's stockings

V's pretty blue/black dress

Best WTF Moments
1. Nate and Serena are about to kiss when Tripp walks into the bar.
2. Damien playing with the toy boat was a cover to sell drugs.
3. Olivia convinces Dan that he had to kiss Vanessa again to realize he loves her.
4. Blair gets Lady Gaga to perform.
5. Chuck finds Jenny and Damien and tells Damien to leave the country.
6. Serena goes with Tripp even after Nate basically tells her he loves her.


What the Bluck ?

 

They Shoot Humphreys, Don't They?

From the Script

Chuck: "Do you really think I want to spend my weekend watching women with tramp stamps work out their daddy issues?"

Jenny: "You're era is over... and so is that headband."

Rufus: "I still really don't get how these events work."

Blair: "SERENA! I mean Serena, there you are."

Blair: "Nate. I didn't see that one coming."

Jenny: "Well, I learned from the best."

Blair: "Good answer."

Olivia: "Have you ever..."

Dan: "Me? No. Have I? No. Wait I... no. Never. Have you?

Chuck: "If you two want to kiss, it won't count as cheating."

Blair: "Hello? I'm stuck in the elevator with someone who sucks all the air out of the room. Send help or I'll be dead within the hour."

Blair (to Eric): "Little Van der Woodsen. I'm impressed with your natural talents."

Blair: "Look! A lost boy from the lost weekend."
Nate: Chuck actually sent me to find you. He has a suprise in the private lodge upstairs. He says please.

Blair: "I used to have a friend like Jenny. I made all these sacrifices and you know what I got back on that investment? Zero. Because girls like her run emotional Ponzi schemes. Serena will never like you the way you like her."

Nate: "What are Blair and Serena even fighting about this time?"
Chuck: "Basically about how much each one loves the other more than the other loves her."
Nate: "Can you even fight about that?"

Blair: "This is not your wedding day! Cotillion only happens once."

Jenny: "I have been so awful to you and Jonathan."
Eric: "True. But I'm a better person than you."

Dan: "We haven't had sex with someone we never want to see again. Wait, I did that one... with Georgina."

Chuck: "A debutante ball without Blair Waldorf is like a Tour de France without Lance Armstrong."
Blair: "I resent the comparison to that man whore. But your other point is well taken."

Blair: "I have a suprise for you."
Chuck: "In that case why are you still dressed."

Blair: "That was yesterday..."

Basstyle

Realism

Chuck acts like he's not excited about Nate's "lost weekend". +2

Apparently, Blair suggested she and Chuck go to the Kandinsky exhibit, which in reality, really is going down at the Guggenheim when the show air. That's just fantabulous. +3 (Ok, -2 for saying 'fantabulous'.) =/

Tripp hires Serena as his media relations rep. +1 cause we all know how this will end.

Chuck hijacks the elevator intercom and forces the girls to make up. +3 (An extra because he says "If you two want to kiss, it won't count as cheating. We all know he had visual confirmation on that elevator.)

Olivia says she has to finish the list, but she definately didn't have sex with someone she never wanted to see again (like Dan said he did). -1 (Only because at some point in the aftermath, we know she will wish she never sees Vanessa again.)

Serena went to Tripp's office to resign... in person. (Actually, even, because she totally would do that.)

Blair totally gives Kyra a homemade dye job, instead of taking her to some fancy city salon. -1

The cotillion was so tacky. First of all, it's all about mothers. The Plastiscines would not have sang "Bitch" during the reception. Lily would not have let Jenny wear what she wore either. -3

Sum Total: +2

For the Love of Eric Damon
 

Blair's dress

B's dress and shoes

The necklacee !

Serena's coat & purse

Serena's top (or dress.. whatever it's cute.)

Best WTF Moments

1. Olivia initiates threesome.

2. Lily finds the letter to Serena from her father.

3. Kyra has Graham Collins as her date, leaving Jenny with no one.

4. Jenny suprises everyone with having Nate as her escort.

5. Chuck trapped Blair and Serena in an elevator.

What the Bluck ?
 

Not one good frame with these two. Love his note though.

Music to My Ears 

Whatever You Like by Anya Marina

Somebody to Love by Leighton Meester

Bitch by the Plastiscines

I Am Down by the Plastiscines

Questions and Panthers by One For the Team

Underneath My Skin by Stella Project

Totally love the face Dan makes while watching Olivia and Vanessa kiss !

The Grandfather: Part II

From the Script

Serena: "Let me guess, you wanted to go upstairs and see if two blondes make a right ?"

Chuck: "Blair's favorite part? Real time surveillance playback. It's naughty."

Blair (to Serena): "If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck... the only prostitute here, is you."

Serena (to Chuck): You of all people know what a prostitute does!

Blair: "Look S, you know wasted better than most of us having been in that state so many times yourself. Looks like you've met your match."

Blair (to Serena): "No one's ever accused you of saying no."

Dan: "Look, as much as I enjoy my current girlfriend talking to my ex-girlfriend about her... fake boyfriend, who is also my current girlfriend's ex, you can get a copy of that Fallon interview right, ?"

Blair: "I need a friend. STAT."
Girl: "I'm your friend."
Blair: "Please. I'm not friends with staff."

Dan: "I need a SARS mask."

Serena: "Ryan totally lost his mojo after Reese got with Jake."

Basstyle

Realism

Olivia's appearance on Jimmy Fallon was the worst. No celebrity would talk about a one month anniversary with someone they're dating on national TV. -1
Also, she went on his show again the next week ? -2

Dan runs out of his apartment, awkwardly leaving his one-month old girlfriend with his parents and diseased sister. +1 Because it's classic Humphrey.

Blair totally licks her lips after her face is covered in frosting, RIGHT after she said she wanted some cake. +1

No way would a hooker get that Valentino bag before Blair would. -1 On second thought, she may have slept with the salesclerk... +1

Chuck so smoothly walked that business man out of the room before he saw Patrick making an ass out of himself. +2 Because Chuck is so awesome this season.

Why would Patrick need to go to an election party? That's not the greatest PR. -1

Yeah, Tripp was the only person that would jump in to save that drowning guy. AND no one else saw that same guy jump in the water ? -2

What was with the Tripp-Serena convo at the end? We were all leaning in waiting for him to sleaze his way into her dress... but he really is a generally good guy afterall? BOO! -1

Sum Total: -2

For the Love of Eric Damon

Serena's dress

Blair's whole outfit

Serena's jacket

The coveted Valentino 360 bag

Brandeis' top

Best WTF Moments

1. Blair's friend was a prostitute.

2. Serena pushed Blair into the cake.

3. Vanessa found out the guy drowning was fake.

4. Nate announced he set it up.

5. Tripp's wife told Grandfather that she set it up.

What the Bluck ?

Music to My Ears

"I Could Rob You" by the Platiscines [set up for campaign party; KC tells Serena about her next assignment]
"Float" by Quitzow [Blair tells her minions about her friend problems]
"The Nerve" by Republic Tigers [Dan watches the Jimmy Fallon video; Vanessa arrives at the party]
"Two Left Feet" by Anya Marina [Patrick tells Serena about Brandeis; Vanessa confronts Nate]
"Everything is Shattering" by Maps [Serena apologizes to Blair]
"I See You" by Mika [end montage]

How To Succeed in Bassness

From the Script

Blair: "Tell those pathetic trick or treaters there's no pre-packaged joy for them here."

Blair: "I was thinking 80s. But shoulder pads could be overwhelming on my delicate frame."

Rufus: "I was going to be Iggy, but I thought that might scare the children."

Dan: "Who could resist free gifts in shiny wrappers?"

Chuck: "This is a business. Not a high school party."

Blair: "I told you I was sorry for my little transgression and you forgave me. Now either you make me kiss a girl already or let's move on."

Dan: "I think I can handle some PG-13 bloodsucking."

Nate: "Seriously man, do you not get internet here in Brooklyn?"

Dan: "I think the most disturbing part of all this is that you've been reading Endless Nights blogs."

Nate: "At least I'm on the list and not working the door."

Olivia: "Flu? As in... Patrick Roberts flu?"

Dan: "He made you levitate."

Blair: "Perez Hilton drew tears on his own photo because he wasn't there."

Dan: "Look at the way she's looking at him, that's love. And lust... and gratitude..."

Nate: "Dude, that's an orgasm."

Blair: "It would make the SoHo house look like one of those dirty public schools with numbers for a name."

Basstyle 

Realism

Nate is such a good friend for looking into Olivia's movies/exboyfriend/blogs for Dan. +1

 

Dan's terrible flu lying/acting, which his actress girlfriend believed. +2

 

Chuck's intensity about not being his father. +2

 

Dorota vacuums Blair's room and simultaneously plays chess with her by saying the move. +2 Dorota is truly awesome.

 

Rufus bought a huge shopping bag of candy for trick or treaters. +1 And it was all from Dylan's Candy Bar. Clearly, marrying Lily is having some type of influence over him. +1

 

There really is no way Serena or KC know who Mark Hamill is. -1

 

Serena tells her boss that breaking up Dan and Olivia is something she has to do on her own. And KC really doesn't mind this ?? -2

 

Chuck's party lasted 5 minutes before it was raided by the cops, and it is going to make front page new? -3 Because that whole plotline was ridiculous.

 

Did Serena really think that Blair would care more about her stupid job than Chuck's first club opening that would set off his career? -5 But then again, she is so self-absorbed that she would think that. So +5

 

Eric looked like he was going to play golf, not like he stepped out of the twenties. -1

 

A little girl dressed up as Lady Gaga for Halloween and no one had a problem with it ? -2

 

Rufus made four pumpkins into KISS. +2

 

Jenny is taking being Queen to seriously, especially since she didn't even want to be Queen last season. And she's really gonna fuck with Eric and Jonathan, her only friends, for her little minions? -3

 

Sum Total: -1

For the Love of Eric Damon 

Blair's whole outfit

Serena's dress & earrings

B's sweater

Dan looks smokin hot !

Serena's top

Best WTF Moments

 

1. Blair goes behind Chuck's back to help him when he didn't want help.

2. Jenny has the girls dump yogurt on Eric's head.

3. Jenny has the girl's egg Jonathan.

4. Serena gets Patrick Roberts to fly down for the party.

5. Olivia tells Dan she lied and really did date Patrick.

What the Bluck ?

 

Music To My Ears

"People Cmon" by Delta Sunshine: Serena tells Blair she isn't forgiven; end montage.
"Show Stopper" by Peaches: The police raid Chuck's club; Blair tells Serena about the plan.
"In Transit" by Albert Hammond Jr: Blair apologizes to Chuck at the club.
"Strictly Game" by the Harlem Shakes: opening montage.